Bitter Sweet
by Freaking Cage
Summary: Rangiku thinks about Gin, and just what he's done. One shot, GinxRangiku R&R is appreciated.


Disclaimer: Bleach has been disclaimed. Ha, I rule, so I can say that.

Rangiku loved alcohol.

It wasn't the taste she loved...Actually, it was the taste she loved. It was so smoothly bitter she couldn't help but take pleasure in the way it made her squirm, grunt and shiver as it went down into her system, slowly corrupting her liver.

Rather, she loved that she didn't love alcohol. The taste did make her cringe, but the bubbly effect it had on her afterwards was something completely worth it. The way it shredded her esophagus and made her hesitate to take another swig- though only a minute period- was a feeling she could only describe as...

Actually, she couldn't really describe that either.

Rangiku was a bit...hypocritical. Well, maybe not hypocritical, but, indecisive? Unsure? Confused more like. She'd had the bad habit of attaching herself to things that shouldn't particularly be attached to. Alcohol, for one.

Ichimaru Gin, for another. He left her. Plain and simple. He'd left her long ago, long before the whole 'Aizen betraying the Soul Society' blah blah blah incident. In her more dramatic moments (usually about 4 shots of sake) she would wonder to herself if Gin had ever really been there with her at all. But soon after (6 shots) she would drawl to herself about how he'd been there- she wasn't _blind_-, yes he'd been there all right. He'd been there right before he left. He'd been there right before he left her for some fat 5th squad captain and joined a bunch of mime-clowns in the sky. He'd been there for the in between parts. He'd been there when she needed him most, and then left.

What did she think about that?

She hated it of course, but a few shots later she would chuckle to herself and lean back into her sofa, casually pushing the Soul Society papers away with her foot and telling herself, _It was just Gin's style_. He had a certain style, she had to admit, however creepy and misunderstood. The way his smile never left his face was a trademark, and a betrayal to Rangiku in existence. The one thing Gin _could_ be counted on was that _stupid_ smile that would never leave that crooked face.

In all honesty, she hated that smile. That smile was a farce. That smile berated her and made her more a fool for wanting him by her side than Aizen, the treacherous louch, did by taking him from her. And she remembered the time when he didn't used to always smile.

At that point in time, he was _her_ Gin, _her_ friend, _her_ _person_. Now he was Aizen's comrade/who the hell knows. In some ways, Rangiku had to admit to herself that she was like Hinamori; she'd been blinded by something and ended up...just _not_ understanding.

So she coped by drinking. Not to say she was a drunkard by all means, or perhaps she was. At least, she only drank when she wanted to. Which was a lot. She wasn't a drunkard by conventional means, merely by her own means.

Rangiku sighed and rested her head back against the top of the sofa, humming drunkenly to herself a tune she couldn't remember where she'd first heard it.

Alcohol helped her deal, but she was in no way a weak woman. Where alcohol gave her strength her self-confidence gave her power. She _moved on_. She wasn't going to be obsessed with a man who only spent his time _leaving _her. Even in fights he'd left! Every time she entered! Rangiku slammed her bottle on the sleeve of the sofa and a few drops spilled from its neck.

Gin had a nice neck. It was very him, in that it was somewhat thin and shadowed, but it was strong. Even if his head was down, he always had his strong, straight neck holding up the base.

Even when all else crumbled, Rangiku had to admit to herself that Gin was a stand-up guy.

In more ways than one. Rangiku wanted to laugh, but couldn't.

_Sorry Gin..._she thought to herself drowsily, before falling into another aimlessly void of consciousness dream-like state. _I just don't get this joke._

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Author's Note: Yay, Rangiku this time. She rocks boulders I tell you, that woman is kick $$. It's about 12:41 a.m. right now, but I can't fall asleep, so whatever. This stupid cough won't go away, curses. But innywho, about the story...

I don't consider Rangiku really a drunk, and I don't mean to imply (really) that she's headed into future AA counseling, but she does like to drink, and this just kind of flowed. Or something. It's past midnight, so sue me. Goodness I'm cranky.

Yes, the last line is a little cheesy and I had a way better one, but I forgot it two seconds after I thought it. I need sleep, but sleep is away having an affair with someone else tonight. Too much random.

I hoped you liked it, and if you'd like, I'll take some...um...whatchamacallsits? Commission writings...or something. But if you want me to imply pairs, it has to be one of the pairs that I've done already (RenjixRukia, GinxRangiku, OrihimexIchigo, OrihimexUlquiorra, AizenxIchigo) If there's one your not sure if I'd do, just pitch it and I'll respond. The worst I'll say is no. I won't be mean to you crazy crack pairing girls (coughcough ICHIDAxICHIGOcough) That cough just won't go away I tell you.

And that's it. Auf Wiedersein meine loida.


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